its so funny that the guy sitting right next to me can see what he truly is. and you knew i already knew. and i told you too. then we agree on so many things and it makes me forget. makes me stay. makes me grounded for a bit. no not you. i'm sure you are still waiting for that day. waiting to win the game. thinking you know you will. win. sad. you think game. you play games. game games gamed. and you'll do the same thing to her. add another crack. bloody red crack. oh my god i'm so serious. oh my god i'm so....then suddenly i'm not. weird. the older one realizes now. kinda' like that song. he was always right there no matter what. but he was also by himself all along. he realizes how hes blinded himself of you. of your ways. the older one. million dollar smile might get hurt once in a while. especially by the lost one. or last one. lost. but then we agree on so many things and it makes me forget makes me stay. makes me grounded for a bit. even if you last or nay i'll appreciate the days. talk and feel. feel and show. for a while once in a while. its about time. even if its not mine.
he says.
my place of employment basically created this new position for me because they realized they were not utilizing all of my experinece, knowledge and assets. well the hours are 9 - 5 which is extremely appealing and i get to drive a company vehicle which rocks my face cuz my car blows. so i started on monday and i think, i know this job rocks all that may rock. i love it already! then aside from going to my old client's yearly meeting and having it be a "lets talk about how good cody has done with "client" for the entire last half of the meeting. the meeting went on atleast an extra half of an hour just talking about me. wow. then on monday i find out i have to come into the office on tuesday to get my picture taken. why do you ask? apparently they are doing a write up on me and about how well i did with "client" and all that for the newsletter. way to go me! i'm appreciative, i'm happy, and i can admit i'm flattered. but in all actuality i'm just doing my job. i guess they aren't used to that there. having someone that actually cares about the clients and does everything they can to do their job the best they can. thats me. my life is always seeming to go back and forth on the teeter totter but right now i feel i'm holding steady. for a few days it was definetley leaning more on one side because there was no balance between work and social. and not that the social has significantly changed its just better and i'm just better. its more balanced. even within itslef (the social) it is more balanced. i think because i'm more aware. of myself and others. i guess i have tanner to thank for that. if he would have never screwed me over my life would have carried on in a way that i now know would have been a rediculous manner. too bad he'll never understand any of it. any of it. talk talk talk.....but where's the beef!? the guts and blood of what you repeat to me. its not there. and thats why i'm not either.
i hung out with kara last night and some co-workers of hers. we all had some interesting conversation after we decided to stop seperating the conversations. 2 by 2. my favorite part of the eveing was everything after "this cards been denied." it was all laughter and squeemish movements, and crickets in our panties from there. it was good. short and good. my bed felt wonderful after that. in a completely sleepy sort of way, you perverts!
i should go. i need to go workout a bit and shower.
i LOVE all of you ~ cody tyler
and i still love you too.... and you....and you.....and you.....oh, and ofcourse you.....and i can't forget about you............;]
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