today is good. leaving that very emotional angry release exhale of a post yesterday has helped. plus it was only a moment of my life. i don't feel that way always. and i will have more. and thats why i am glad i write. but some people may read and think it to far. and think i am constantly sulking about it. and if the person i wrote it about reads it and thinks that - get over your self. it hurts but its not all consuming. and also don't take it too personal either. its a blog. its a release.
but i guess thats what happens when you lose a best friend for no apparent reason other than their selfcentered choices. we've all done it. some just do it at different levels and to different extent. thanks to gustavo the other night for hearing me out. and ray for letting me get out last night. i've decided to concentrate on being more than ok or always ok. but i will try my best not to do what was just done to me. i will not treat people like characters in the movie of my life. i will be kind and generous again. i just lost touch. it happens when you convince yourself you are not good enough or wrong or bad cuz someone does something like this. and they did it not to you. they've done it to themselves cuz they are the ones that will have to pay later. you can't take it too personal, it can't be about you when everything to them is about them.
love ~ me.
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