here i come there i go

so i'm starting to feel a bit overwhelmed and i am kind of in the mode of "do anything that has nothing to do with what you need to do."

i'm moving to north carolina as of may 16th. i will be working for the autism society just outside of raleigh, as in about 30 minutes from. i'm so excited for this. it is going to be a beautiful experience for me. hell i teared up just reading about it. right now it is just for the summer but the guy who hired me told me that with my passion and experience for autism and the amount of contacts i'll have by the end of the summer i could easily go further. i guess we'll see.

encase you didn't notice may 16th is roughly 2 weeks from now. yeah, i found out i got the job on monday. this whole thing has been very sudden. so i have an ass load of shit i need to do before i leave. double that ass load. but it will be fine and it will all get taken care of. i'm not worried just a little frazzled on the ends. there are a lot of things i can't do until payday, which is friday and i hate waiting. especially when i could just have it taken care of by now but i have to wait for my payday to get it all squared away. but i am very much excited. very much. even though i will be missing out on birthdays, especially claire's, and the day of meghan's graduation is the day i start. i'm going to miss out on madonna's concert.....my heart just cracked a little... ;] but really some of those things are a big deal to me. like meghan and claire. those are two of my best bitches...i love them. hell claire helped me get this job!there are so many different paths around me these days. ones of my own footprints and the rest of people i love. growth. as in upward not necessarily older.

i'll keep you posted.

i saw the you i never knew last night. for a second. and just one. cuz you left after 2. departure because of arrival. why? they asked me about it. they asked if it was because of me. i told them maybe, probably, how the hell should i know. what does it matter. it wasn't the first time i watched you go. they tell me your business or at least try to. then again they try to tell mine too. they pretend they know. they pretend. do you. pretend. anymore. have you finally let go. or have you let it go. the business they tell speaks of this. but i chose to refuse this. this information. my inform.ation. do you still read. you. just you. or one and two. red not blue. fuck off. nice shirt. hi. are you gonna' say hi. should i now. i remember a certain drunk dial that made me out to be the bad guy. do you read too. still. too. why? do you know? my life has turned. in 2 ways. i 'm leaving for something beautiful. and i'm feeling like something beautiful. and i don't mean looks shallow souls. inside and out. and all around. i miss some of you already. with my move on. i'll miss some important activities. as i move on. i'm not sure where i'm headed. but then again i never was. so when august comes remember me. whether i'm back or gone knowingly. up left stay stay up left stay stay up??? i'm not sure. let you know as the days go. i love you all. i love you all.

i'm not sure how frequent this will remain during the summer but i will try.

love ~ cody tyler